Well it's happend, I had wondered if it would seeing as how I'm already compulsive enough, though both David and I are finding this really funny. It started the other day when I was getting cans for a canned food drive for my kids at work. I open up that bottom cabinet and see that it needed to be cleaned out, oh if only that was enough. All the sudden I'm disquested by the fact that the pasta sauce cans are next to the rice and the cereal boxes are next to the taco shells and that was enough! The next thing I knew I had scrubbed the shelves, put down liner and neatly organized the shelves so that the pasta sauce was next to the pasta, the rice furthur down and the bottom shelf is now exclusively the breakfast shelf. I'd like to say that the craziness has stopped there, but no longer had I finished that project than I had found a new one. Those baby clothes that I have been collecting (and been given), that are in their nice little box had to be organized by size, not that they even been washed yet, but the thought of not knowing how many I had of each size started to slowly eat at me. Then two days ago it was the refridgerator, every shelf and drawer was taken out, scrubbed down and cleaned out. Then today I found myself at work looking for the things that I can compulsively fix - this morning alone it was our activity log books, I ordered them by date (not just by theme), then the small group files needed to be cleaned and finally I even found myself color coding the lunch table charts, according to table. So I think it is safe to say that the nesting has begun and while it finds me in a bit of a frenzy, I do really love the significance of it.
The craziness doesn't stop there either. I find myself feeling less like me, I feel like I don't always know/understand my body, I feel akward in my clothes, can't seem to manage my hair in a way that I like and my brain has turned to mush. And while I know it's for the most amazing thing life can give you, it's hard not to feel a little sad at the loss of one's self. I know I'll find me again, I'm in there somewhere, but for now I'm more than happy being me and him. Like David told me, "Right now you may not feel like you, but it's because your more now than ever before and that's pretty amazing," - pretty smart that husband of mine. And everytime I start to miss how normal I once was (if you can call it normal) I just remind myself that sharing myself to help this little guy get strong is worth everything in the world, and I wouldn't trade it for anything. I love being pregnant.
As I can feel our little guy getting stronger and stronger I've also found some of my energy again - better late than never and we'll see how long this lasts! But his kicks and movements become more and more defined/noticable. Not to mention higher, the other day I felt him move above my belly button, it was a much welcomed first - I love feeling him move. I swear everytime I feel a movement I can't help but hold my tummy and think about how amazing it is, even when it means he's tap dancing on my bladder and yes to me it really feels like he's dancing on it! Besides his amazing dancing abilities, he is experiencing a big growth spirt. This week alone he is supposed to gain about 6 oz. - amazing! He can now hear things like my heart beating, voices resonating and the growling noises in my tummy ( I hope they don't scare him!). His skin has started to take on some color and as he gains more and more weight he will become more smooth than wrinkly.
As I bring this entry to an end today, I feel him moving about, so I think I'll go take sometime to lie down and feel him a little better. Hope all is well, can't wait to see some of you soon, please keep us in your thoughts and prayers! Much love! =0)
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